The Quirky Life of P

Humor and satire revolving around Mr P- a fictional mix of an avatar of Mr Bean and the veritable Bertram Wooster of Wodehouse fame.

P’s woes with customs! Lest he forgets…

New PictureNew Picture (3)From Adelaide to Auckland on his flight, P stopped over in Melbourne;

He ate his lunch of sandwiches, but the pear was left alone

In his bag obliviously, the pear flew to the city of sails

There at the airport before customs, P stood biting out his nails:

He had forgotten all about the uneaten, neglected pear

And failed to mention the fruit in his customs questionnaire;

Though not jailed, he had to pay a hefty sum as fine!

So now in transit P never takes fruits with him to dine.

Lest he forgets………..




New Picture (2)



If you would ask Mr P to mention some scary things he has done in his life, he would say it was passing through customs and immigration and border security at the various international airports during his travels. No matter how many times he had done this during his frequent travels, he was a nervous wreck as he passed through these checks. 

Every time, he felt that the officers who checked his passport and looked into his eyes were trying to read his deepest secrets and did not like what they saw! Under their piercing scrutiny, just the thought of the Tylenol and Paracetamol tablets he carried for headaches, made him feel as though he was carrying something illegal. Whenever they asked him about the purpose of his travel, he felt that they believed he had some evil plans. This made P so nervous that his replies often came out in a squeaky voice. P would struggle to correct his voice to their next question and it would then come out as a hoarse grunt. Suffice to say that all this combined with his fidgeting made him appear as a suspicious character. So, very often he was subjected to strong scrutiny and checking.  Often he was asked to remove his shoes and he was pat-checked. Then at the airport there were those sniffer dogs. After that incident on his travel to New Zealand when he had to pay a fine of NZ$ 200 for carrying a forgotten pear in his bag from the lunch at Melbourne, he was very careful. He understood how much New Zealand customs hated plant material……… in the luggage. So he had made sure that he was not carrying any plant material to that country. Yet on one travel, this little sniffer dog had hounded him and the customs officer had detained him and thoroughly checked his bags before the problem was identified as some residual smell from the bananas he used to carry for lunch in his briefcase to work. Until he was allowed to proceed, he had felt that every eye in the airport was on him, scornfully wondering what drugs he was carrying in his bags! 

P had been deeply embarrassed by this incident and so bought a brand new “American Tourister” bag from Wal-Mart to carry as cabin bag on his next trip. On reaching Auckland airport, Mr P rested his new bag on the floor and was in the process of collecting his checked in luggage from the conveyor belt when a sniffer dog came a-sniffing at his bag! “Not again!” thought Mr P as the customs officer followed and started examining his bag. The officer started questioning Mr P on the contents and kept asking if Mr P had any fruits in the bag within the past few days. “No, Never”, he replied. “Just to avoid this situation I left at home my regular briefcase in which I take my lunch to work. This is a brand new bag that I bought just yesterday!”

“Ah! That explains it!” said the officer. “Sometimes this sniffer dog falsely alerts to the smell of new bags!” 

P stood agape! “One can never win with immigration, customs and border security!” he realised. “You could not avoid suspicion if you traveled with your old fruity smelling bag. Can you not travel with a new one either? Life was tough.”

New Picture (4)



In Transit

Single Post Navigation

14 thoughts on “P’s woes with customs! Lest he forgets…

  1. I sympathize with P, poor chap always in a no win situation. His cartoon figure is a delight.


  2. Oh my gosh! Poor little pear, and he looks like such a cute little pear, who could have anything against him? 😉


    • Cute pear or rosy apple, New Zealand customs and border security really have it in for them or any other plant material in your luggage! It needs to be appreciated for they are protecting New Zealand flora and fauna and the environment 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

      • Oh yes! It actually is a serious task. Arizona is no longer the allergy-free State it used to be because of so many people sneaking in plants when moving there, over the years. I know. My allergies were awful, year-round when I lived there. 😀


      • P has never been to Arizona, so he can be freed from any blame for the allergies there 😀 He lived in South Dakota for some time.. BRRRR. And he had allergies when the crab apples blossomed… 😀
        P is very grateful to you for visiting and commenting 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

  3. Seriously, you can get in trouble for having fruit ion your luggage?? I guess you can tell I never fly 😀


    • Thank you for visiting and commenting Loupmojo. 🙂 If you fly into New Zealand, you will be in trouble with customs and border security if you have fruits or any other plant material or animal material in your luggage! They have very strict rules for protecting New Zealand flora,fauna and the environment. Loupmojo, But I guess there are also countries where you can fly in with an entire forest or even an elephant and nobody would care! 😀


  4. Pingback: Transiting | It's Mayur Remember?

  5. Ah, poor P. I, too, ran into a darling sniffer dog (beagle) in NZ some years ago. He picked up the scent of apples in my bag, which was now empty. After explaining that I had carried some luscious NZ apples in that bag for snacks during my explorations of their beautiful country, the customs officer simply smiled and assured me I could leave. So, poor P, you are not alone and it is in the interest of that lovely country to protect their flora and fauna as they should.


  6. If Olivia and Oscar ever meet your little ‘fruit’ buddies, I’ll have to lock them up to keep them in check. LOL. Customs really would have a field day with orples, don’t you think? I love your little cartoons to go along with your story. Congrats on that new lunch bag, too, by the way. 😉


    • Thank you orples for dropping in and commenting :). I would certainly advice you to keep away from New Zealand customs unless Olivia and Oscar wouldn’t mind some quarantine :D. I find them very cute too!


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: