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The Quirky Life of P

Humor and satire revolving around Mr P- a fictional mix of an avatar of Mr Bean and the veritable Bertram Wooster of Wodehouse fame.

P buys Bitcoins


 

long or short

A parody of Madame Zeroni’s song in Holes
If only, if only,” Mr P sighs,
“The price of cryptos would go up so high”
While he waits below, hungry and lonely,
Longing for BTC to moo-oo-oon,
“If only, if only.”

It was a pleasant Saturday afternoon and P had just got up and had a shower. As he was getting out to buy his burger for lunch, P saw his neighbour, a stock trader by profession, pruning his rose bushes in the garden and went over to the picket fence to have a chat.

Neighbour: “P, I hope you won’t mind but I have to ask you this question. You are looking very tired these days. What’s up?”

P: “I’ll let you into my secret. You see, I am planning to buy a Lamborghini.”

Neighbour astonishedly: “Did you win the lotto or something?”

P: “No, but I am into crypto currency these days and so I can hardly sleep. And maybe that’s why I look tired.”

Neighbour: “Ah! I see… So what coins?”

P: “Only bitcoin.”

Neighbour: “Are you long or short?”

P was puzzled and stunned, wondering why his neighbour who was normally very circumspect and prudent, was changing the topic from crypto trading to his physical dimensions……

Tired of his old Getz, he longed for a Lambo
And though without a twin or a name like Winklevoss,
P went into crypto-world like daring Rambo,
Hoping it would  end all his monetary woes!

But P bit off more than what he could chew,
When he borrowed money from his credit card
And bitcoins he could buy just one or two;
His get-rich-quick plans were totally marred!

Of blockchain and cryptos P had no clue
And had bought the BTC at its peak,
Hoping its value would then accrue;
But crashing prices left his future bleak.

He was sleepless, tracking crypto price,
As he HODLed onto his coins tight;
Fud and fomo made his heart rate rise
As bulls and bears made their daily fight.

He doesn’t get what is ‘short’ or ‘long’
But if only, if only BTC would moon,
He can stop singing that soulful song
From “Holes”, he sings so out of tune;
For his neighbours, it would be such a boon!

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